


Amorous Love for the Righteous Man

by MelancholySeraph



Category: Supernatural
Genre: After Naomi, Castiel loves Dean so much it hurts, Castiel will prove to Dean that he's loved, Dean feels unworthy, Drabble, M/M, No particular point in Canon, One Shot, Pre-Relationship, but so much love, or are they?, they're in love, unrequited feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-23
Updated: 2018-05-23
Packaged: 2019-05-10 09:40:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14734545
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MelancholySeraph/pseuds/MelancholySeraph
Summary: Castiel thinks about all the ways he'd like to show Dean Winchester how he loves him. He thinks about why he loves him even as he listens with half an ear to Dean talking. Perhaps his feelings will always go unrequited... Or will they?





	Amorous Love for the Righteous Man

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kiodragon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kiodragon/gifts).



> So basically, my dictionary app on my laptop spits a word at me every day and the other day it threw "Amorous" at me. I was like, "Hmm..." So I wrote a Destiel word prompt surrounding the definition. And, granted, this doesn't necessarily need to be thrown in right here; But I fucking love this fic so much. It's one of my favorite things I've written, by far.
> 
> Only marked as Graphic Violence because it mentions the way Cas beat the crap outta Dean when Naomi was mind-whammying him. It's not exactly graphic, but I didn't want to catch anybody off guard.
> 
> Amorous: inclined toward or displaying love
> 
> I gifted this work to Kiodragon for making her cry with another fic of mine. I hope to make her smile with this one! And the fact that she supports all the fics I write, and continually comments on them and gives me much needed and much-loved feedback. You're the best, dude! It's thanks to her that Praying For a Dimension Switch is even on here. (That's another work of mine). Anyways, yeah. I hope you like it! <3 I hope it makes up for They Say Love Always Wins, LOL. :D

  
  
"Cas, what's up with you man?" Dean asks me from with a curious light in his eyes. The diner is bustling with people, weary travelers like us, all around them but I barely notice. The din of noise, laughter and things frying and waitresses pouring coffee is drowned out and falls on deaf ears. I'm focused on Dean. Dean's verdant green eyes, his pink lips, and kind smile. I get lost looking at him.  
  
"Cas?" Dean's deep timbre brings me to the present again. "My apologies, Dean. I was thinking."  
  
Dean arches an eyebrow at me. "Thinking, huh? Sounds serious. Anything I want to know about?" I smile wistfully inside my own mind. Physically, my vessel doesn't change.  
  
"Perhaps one day. In the meantime, would you like to talk about the case?"  
  
"Yeah, okay then... Anyway, these murders keep popping up all on the same..."  
  
I listen with half an ear, I'm loathed to not hear Dean's voice, but I can't stop my mind from thinking. Thinking about how much I'd like to tell Dean what I feel. Show him how I feel. I could write odes about the Righteous Man. I could write ballads about how brightly his soul shone in Hell, and how it was the beacon that drew me to him from such a great height. I could see it even from Heaven, not that he would believe that. Dean's always believed he isn't worthy, and I have endeavored since Day One to teach him otherwise. So far I am unsuccessful but I hold out hope that one day soon Dean will realize. I've noticed small things. Little things that most people wouldn't notice. If Dean starts feeling sick he will actually take cold medicine now instead of saying it's nothing and pushing on until he's too sick to move any further. One small way he's showing his body love now.  
  
Another is the way that he asks me for help sometimes, even when it's not a dire emergency as has become his habit over so many years. He's come to realize that he doesn't have to do it all by himself and that that is not a reflection of his character or ability. It's little things like that that give me hope. They give me hope that one day I can show Dean how I really feel. I want to wake him up with gentle kisses in the morning on cheap motel beds and get him coffee just the way he likes it before we get into the Impala on our way to the next destination that calls. I want to hug him when he's feeling down and hold him together when he feels broken. I'd like to kiss the sadness from his lips and wipe the tears from his eyes when the world sets so heavy on his shoulders that he feels he may shatter. If only he knew how strong he really is. I want to give him things he needs that don't involve weapons or information, though I don't mind that. I want to show Dean Winchester how much I love him. He's a very stubborn man, but I am very persistent. And right now I am patient. I would wait forever for Dean. Wait until he knows he's worthy of love and is willing to fight for it. I know he loves me. My Grace that resides in his soul tells me that much. I've known ever since Naomi and the angel tablet.  
  
The words Dean was going to tell me were not "I need you." They were _"I love you."_  
  
I was shaken. I felt it so very strongly at the time, everything in Dean's very being calling out for me to stop. That's how I made my decision. I stopped. After the connection with Naomi was broken the full understanding of my actions plagued me. To see Dean's face bloody and swollen by my hand... It hurt me to my core. I doubt he noticed, but my hand shook when I reached out to heal the damage I did to my beloved. He tried to recoil from me, thinking I would hurt him again because that's all Dean's known. It breaks my heart each time I see it. But I pushed forward and healed him anyway, even as his body tried to lean away.  
  
And that's what I've been doing for years, and will continue to do for however many more it takes for Dean to realize he can have me. My mind races with so many different ways I will show Dean how much I love him. Simple gestures and grand ones alike. I will show him every way that I love him, even now I do as much as he will allow. Dean is a very stubborn man. But I am a very determined seraph. I will wait a lifetime if I have to, but I will show Dean Winchester how much he is loved.  
  
"Cas, you listening?" I smile and my eyes meet his across the table. "Or course. You know I will assist in any way I can." Dean looks away and his lips slide into a small, almost shy smile.  
  
"I know you will, buddy." He says quietly. Hope burgeons in my chest, and I smile wider. Perhaps I will not have to wait a lifetime. Perhaps I am much closer than I thought.  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Comment and tell me whatcha think if you wanna :D


End file.
